Reactive Dog, Tough Neighborhood: A Plan for Accountability, Safety, and Real Change

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Welcome to Off Leash and Unfiltered Trigger Warning. I'm Kati Peppe, delivering the Truth in Dog Training.

00:29 — Kati introduces Diamond K9 Dog Training and its focus on off-leash obedience, behavior modification,…

Thanks for joining us for another episode of Off Leash and Unfiltered. I'm your host, Kati Peppe, and I own Diamond Canine Dog training in Biddeford, Maine. We specialize in eco training for off-leash obedience and behavior modifications, so helping people stop behaviors they don't like. Barking, jumping, getting into the trash and more serious things, leash, reactivity, aggression, resource guarding. And we love working with nervous and fearful and anxious dogs as well. We also offer puppy programs, so that's who we are and what we do. And this podcast is just our way of sharing everything we see and do and learn every day with you guys.

Everything we're doing with the dogs and with our clients. And our hope is you'll get something out of this that will help you with your own dog. So don't forget to hit subscribe to help support the podcast. Let's dive in. Picture this, you go through a divorce, you find yourself moving into a little suburban trailer park type environment where you are surrounded by little old ladies and they're small, yappy, untrained dogs, which is fine. There's no judgment here against people that belong to any of those groups. <laugh>, okay, I'm not making fun of older people.

I'm not making fun of people in trailer parks and I'm not making fun of people with little yappy dogs. Well, maybe there's a little judgment there, <laugh>.

Um, but as long as they're under control into your business, uh, so, but picture that right? And this is not an environment that you're used to living in, of course, and you don't quite fit in because you have a large anxious German shepherd. And, you know, the dog's probably always been anxious, but he did okay where he was living and now he's older, six, seven years old and thrust into this new environment surrounded by, um, things. He is not familiar with dogs, he is not familiar with yappy dogs at that, which of course, and, you know, divorce is obviously stressful.

So I have to assume stress is part of the situation here as well. A dog's really, really anxious, right? Probably much worse than normal than his normal self. And imagine he's barking, kind of reacting at the other dogs. This makes little old ladies uncomfortable and they call the police on you.

It's not a great situation. It's not a great day-to-day life, um, where you have to basically be thinking about that all the time, kind of walking on eggshells because the fact is like, it's your dog, you know what I mean? And you have a right. Take your dog outside. You have a right to take your dog for a walk. And even if your dog does react to other dogs, you still have a right to do that. I mean, what else are you going to do? You can't trap your dog inside. Um, so it's a really, really uncomfortable situation socially to have to wake up to and navigate your way through every single day.

And that is the call that I just took my friends. But not just that, the unfortunate thing is, um, this person sounds like a really responsible dog owner, um, who is just trying to adapt to a new lifestyle, adapt, you know, help his dog adapt to a new environment, um, and get him over these things that are, are causing him to react.

04:31 — The Shepherd slipped through an ajar door, charged another dog, and pinned it without…

But he doesn't really know how to do it. He is not equipped with the tools and skills to do it. And so he is looking for some help with that, which you know, is a good thing. Um, however, <laugh> in the interim, what's happened is he accidentally left his door crack open and your dog will never miss an opportunity, um, to take advantage of a, of cracked door <laugh>. So, so out the door, his German shepherd went. And you can imagine what kind of upset that created, um, in the neighborhood. So there were other dogs present at the time, which may be what triggered his dog to actually go out the door.

And he did charge at the other dog, and he did physically pin the other dog to the ground, and it was a little dog, uh, but he didn't hurt him. Um, my estimation is if he wanted to hurt him, uh, he probably would. Now, who knows, we might've just gotten lucky, but chances are this dog is much, much bigger than the other dog. And if his intent was to just go kill the other dog, he probably would've, or he would've at least, um, left holes in him. And there weren't, there weren't any.

So we have a situation now, right, where the neighborhood already wasn't very welcoming, you know, the people there were scared of the dog, they didn't like the dog. And in my estimation, they really were kind of giving the guy a harder time than he deserved because he was trying. Um, and you know, what are you gonna do <laugh>? So, and he does leave the neighborhood now just to go walk his dog, which is a pain in the ass, right? It's like you have to get in your car and actually leave the neighborhood just to go walk your dog around and get him his, like minimal exercise requirements met, uh, which is unfortunate.

But then after this incident, you can imagine things aren't any less hostile. Um, they're actually much, much worse. And I think it's easy when you're in a position like that to obviously feel defensive, which this guy does.

Um, and like I said, he's going through major life changes anyway, so like he's already got a lot on his plate, a lot weighing on his shoulders, a lot on his mind, right? I mean, I mean, don't we? All right? It's like we all have something going on or have or had something going on. Um, so he's in the midst of, you know, his personal stuff. And then on top of that, he's got to deal with, um, sort of the social hostility that has, <laugh> has been directed at him in the neighborhood since he's moved in.

And he has this dog that just doesn't fit in with the other dogs and is reacting to them and making people uncomfortable. Um, and then he makes this unfortunate mistake of of not having the door quite shut properly and his dog getting out and going after this little dog. Um, but you know, like I said, leading up to that, there had already been so much drama. This, this person is naturally going to be in a more defensive state of mind. And I think that that's natural and normal. Um, but the problem with it is, um, at the end of the day, even though it was an accident, it's not acceptable, right?

Naturally. Like nobody needs me to tell them that.

08:15 — The owner must acknowledge that his dog escaped and physically bullied another dog, even…

Um, but sometimes people do need me to tell them that because it's easy to just kind of get overrun by our emotions, especially if we feel like up until that point we had been treated really unfairly. It's easy to stay focused on that and lose sight of proper evaluation of what actually happened that day, nevermind all the days before, right? So what it all boils down to is your dog got away from you and physically, physically bullied another dog, right? Didn't just invade their space, which would be bad enough, right? If an off leash dog runs up to me, especially in a place where leashes are required, but regardless, I don't want that.

I don't want dogs running up to me, even if they're quote unquote friendly. Um, I don't, I don't want that. I don't want to meet your dog. It's not that I don't like your dog, it's that I don't know your dog and I'm not gonna make it my job or my priority to get to know everybody else's dogs <laugh>.

Uh, so it just doesn't make sense to do that because there's no benefit, there's no reason I need to do that. Um, but there's lots of risk and there's just, to me, the most respectful way to greet a new dog really is mostly to ignore them. And so I'm not interested in meeting other people's dogs. I don't want them running up to me. I don't want them running up to my dog because I don't know what's gonna happen. Um, even if you say your dog is friendly, I don't know what's gonna happen. But nevermind if we already have a history of seeing your dog react poorly toward the other dogs in the neighborhood.

Now I'm gonna be really on edge. I'm gonna be very upset. I'm gonna be more scared, right? Of course. Now. So you can see kind of both sides here, um, just sort of coming to a full rolling boil when this incident happened.

And I think it's gonna be really, really imperative for obviously this person to get their dog some formal training, which of course, that's why we're talking. He's, um, trying to get set up to do that. And really, you know, it might just be a saving grace for them all the way around because not only will this training give his working power breed dog something to actually do something to focus on, something to care about, instead of just going haywire and being frantic, um, and trying to control the environment and freaking out about the environment all the time, it will have a more focused directed agenda, right?

These are the expectations, these are the things I want you to do, right? And some of those things will be automatic and default. Some of those things will be trained, um, in the form of commands, right? I want you to lay down, I want you to go to your place. I want you to walk in a heel, right? Right. Now, this person has an intense working breed of dog who's never known work, who's never known, rules and boundaries, who's never known consequences, who's never known any of that. And they've never known what their role is in the relationship in the world.

Um, and they've, excuse me, I'm to sneeze. I have been sneezing like crazy. I don't know if it's allergies or what, it's another one. <laugh>.

Alright, excuse me guys. <laugh>, sorry. Um, and he may be somewhat anxious just genetically that he might have a, a tendency toward anxiety, which is actually pretty common in the shepherds. We see them sort of lean that way a lot of the time. But then if you take a dog like that and you just thrust them into the world with no rules, no boundaries, no direction, no job to do, no clear path to walk, it makes them nuts, right? They just have no idea what to do, what they're supposed to be doing. And it's just all question marks and it's all just frantic, high, high energy drive just flying around and nowhere to really direct it.

And it's not healthy. So I think a formal training program would help them just in that respect, just totally to, to put some order to things, to take this dog's drive and energy and all this natural guarding instinct as well, and sort of put all of these drives into something besides being frantic to put it into, oh, I have to think about what my owner handler wants.

13:44 — Kati pairs consequences for barking, lunging, and pulling with alternate behaviors such as heel,…

I have to think about what they ask me to do. I have to focus on executing and holding this command and doing this thing. And also by the way, we're gonna tell the dog, you're not allowed to do those other things you're doing. We want you to do this, right? So it's very clear contrast. We're not gonna bark out the window at dogs or little old ladies. We're not gonna pull and lunge on the leash. We're not gonna do any of that stuff. There's going to be a really uncomfortable consequence for doing those things. But then we are also going to have an alternate behavior that is expected, and I use the word expected there because we don't always wanna have to be telling the dog verbally and nagging them to do something else.

We want, for the most part, for this to be automatic.

Now, yes, we can ask the dog to do things like heel and lay down, right? But there are some things that I really want to just be second nature, like walking nicely on a leash. Maybe not a perfect heel, but that should be default. You always do that. You're never allowed to pull me. I don't care if we're in a a heel or not, you cannot pull me, you cannot bark at people. Um, right? So there's still rules and, and those are automatic and they're expected when we go to a door, you're not allowed to crowd the door.

You're not allowed to run through the door. Again, automatic and expected when I put down a bowl of food. You can't rush toward the food, you can't just assume it's yours. That's not allowed. We want that to be automatic and default. I don't wanna have to tell the dog, no, you can't eat that.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Uh, uh, sit, sit, sit. Um, or same thing at the door. I don't wanna be managing managing, right? Because that just, that's just more management. More management. It doesn't solve anything. It doesn't fix anything. It doesn't improve the dog's state of mind. It doesn't clarify for your dog what the dynamic is. It doesn't clarify for the dog what their role is. It doesn't make it clear that in every circumstance, their whole job is to look to you and wait and see what you want them to do, right? If you can't set that precedent with food with the front door, then why in the hell would you expect to be able to set it, um, when there's another dog around, when there's a stranger around, when there's a squirrel running by or any of those things, whatever your dog's thing is, right?

If you can't create a dog, you can't build a dog that just automatically knows what you expect in those easier situations, then you're certainly not gonna get it in the harder situations, right? And you're gonna have to rely on management. You're gonna be hanging onto that leash, physically managing your dog, right? Restraining them. And while I certainly hope you would do that, rather than just let your dog go, um,

16:47 — Kati distinguishes reliable baseline obedience from repeatedly restraining a dog or issuing commands throughout…

That is restraint. It's not, it's not training. <laugh> not really, right? We're just hanging on for dear life. Um, there's a big, big difference between restraining, restraining your dog or training your dog. There's a big difference between you having to tell your dog constantly all these things you want them to do and keep that information constantly coming in or teaching your dog. That's baseline. That's the normal. This is every day, buddy. This is what I want you to do there. It, it doesn't change. Like there is no day off from doing these things. There is no time where it's okay for you to own the door and just go do what you the door run through the right, which by the way, that accidental door slip, that's a thing that we can teach dogs not to do.

Um, and if we had done that before this point, then obviously that incident would've never even happened, right? And so that's what people don't understand, right? And that's not me picking on this person. Um, this was an unfortunate accident. He's already having a terrible time. I get it. But my point is, when I'm in a lesson with a client and I say, Hey, let's teach your dog not to bolt through open doors. This is how we do it. And of course it involves a very high correction for bolting through an open door,

Right? Which we then contrast with, it's totally okay to go through a door. If I invite you, if I give you permission, there's no consequence when you do that. That's fine. Right? So they need that contrast, they need that pattern. But that's what we do. And they learn if there's no invite, if there's no instruction to move through the door and they choose to do it on their own, it's gonna suck. Don't do it. So when I'm doing that and I'm having that conversation with people, nobody wants to do that, right? Almost nobody goes home and does that, but then they end up in situations like this.

Now, to my knowledge, he's never done a formal training program. So I'm not talking about him. I'm just saying this is a great example of the type of thing that can be avoided when you are with a trainer, when you are in a lesson and they say, Hey, let's, we know this is a thing your dog tries to do, let's fix it. So they don't do that thing anymore. And then you don't have to find yourself in the position where your dog goes after another dog. Your dog charges up to a walker or a biker, your dog gets flattened by A GMC.

You don't have to be that person, right? So if you don't wanna do that, you are literally choosing

To take the risk of being that person instead of subjecting your dog to a couple moments of discomfort. I mean, it's just crazy to me. It's crazy not to do that, especially if you do live in a neighborhood like that. Like, um, then you definitely, you cannot afford to be, to be that person,

20:32 — Brief training discomfort is preferable to the larger risks of future fights, injuries, neighborhood…

Right? So I think a training program, um, where the dog is actually gonna know by default what the expectations are, what is not acceptable and what is expected with food, with thresholds, all these things. This is a working dog, and yet there's no work, right? And doing some fun work stuff, doing some scent work, like sure, right? It just isn't what we do. But highly recommend that as part of your dog's plan, if you have a drivey, high energy working type dog, like give them stuff to do, problem is people become kind of absorbed by this whole doing work thing.

And sometimes they start to talk and act like it is the only thing that matters. Um, a good example of that is I had, I've talked about this dog before, um, a Labrador who was like my worst case of separation anxiety ever. And everybody thought he just needed work to do. And it's like, no guys. It's like, I agree, fulfilling this dog's natural like needs and ability to work. Absolutely, it's a great part of the plan, but I don't care how much work you give this dog, he's still gonna have extreme separation anxiety.

It's not gonna just go away. And people become very reliant on like exercise stimulation, keeping the dog busy. And in turn, when we do that, a lot of times we actually make the dog worse because we continue to kick the can down the road, let them rehearse their behaviors, let them rehearse overstimulation over arousal anxiety. They're not developing any real coping skills, they're just developing, taking those anxieties out on the world, right? Having to constantly chew, having to constantly pace, um, having to constantly move and it's not helping, it's hurting. So definitely in these guys' case, I'm really rooting for them.

I hope that they do, um, sign up officially for a program. 'cause I think it would do them. Uh, just worlds and worlds of good to have the obedience in place to be giving the dog some standards and some work to do, um, to empower the owner to get better behavior from his dog.

Um, so he can stop the behaviors he doesn't like, which primarily is the reactivity. And the dog is really insecure. I mean, he did mention on the call that the dog's behavior at the vet is, um, definitely a very fearful response. Like sometimes losing control of bowels and that sort of thing. So this is a dog that's really, really insecure and it for those dogs, guys see, people think you need to be less bossy, right? Less militant. If you see me, I'm doing the air quotes with the dogs that are more nervous, more fearful. No, they need it more.

It's more important with those dogs for them to know who's in charge, what's going on, what's expected of me, right? Because they can't relax until they have that. Um, there's too many question marks. There's too much uncertainty. Um, and they just lose their mind.

23:56 — Firm, predictable rules can reduce an insecure dog’s uncertainty and help the handler build…

So I think also this would help the dog build some confidence and help is owner build some confidence. And what I would love to see is them strutting around not having to get in his car and leave to take his damn dog for a walk anymore, but being able to get in his car and sorry, being able to just walk in his own neighborhood and all the little yappy dogs around him doing their thing while he walks by with just the best behaved dog in the park. Like that would be awesome. It would be so awesome.

But I think to get there, a few things need to happen. I mean, we need to do this training program. We need to really, really work with the owner a lot, which we always do. Um, but I mean, he's living in a tough environment where he's going to be pummeled with these triggers constantly.

So he really needs to understand what's happening, how to do it, how to address it. You know, all these things are gonna be so important for him to become very, very skilled at working with his dog. Um, because he's living in a tough situation. And again, there's no days off from it, right? This is where he lives. Um, he's gotta be willing to make the lifestyle changes. And we talked about that. Um, he's gonna be willing to use his crate more to use more structure. He is gonna be willing to tell his dog no to things right now, um, until he can get that dog into a better state of mind and start getting some better behavior.

And I think it's really important too, for him to take accountability for what happened. Um, and we had that talk. And it is hard to tell people that, 'cause I know they're hurting.

Like this guy's in a bad place probably right now, like mentally, right? He's got a lot going on. Personally, things aren't like going great <laugh>, right? But at the end of the day, like I said, no matter how shitty the people in his neighborhood are, no matter how shitty the dogs in his neighborhood are, no matter how unfair he might feel like life is right now, at the end of the day, his dog is his responsibility. It got away from him. It ran up to these people, which it shouldn't even have been able to do.

And then it physically, um, muckled onto this dog, um, didn't put holes in it, thank God, but it could have, right? And at the end of the day, it's just not a good look to be indignant about that. You have to take full, full accountability for that. And I also think it's just super important for the owner to be in that mindset of accountability if they wanna really reach their goals with their dog, right? Because it's really easy to just blame other people and other environmental factors and not take responsibility. And then we kind of have an excuse and a free pass to just fail at our training.

And we don't want that for people. It's so important to us that our customers are successful. We wanna see people reach their goals and we know the best guarantor of that is for them to take full responsibility for what happens, right? Because nobody wants to fail.

Nobody wants something that is entirely within their ability to fail, right? And so once we accept full accountability for our dog's behavior, we tend to be a lot more successful because we know, like we've admitted out loud that it comes down to us. And so that's a really, really powerful shift in mindset.

Um, and it's just a better look. And I think it can be really hard to do in the moment. Um, which I totally get, I totally get feeling defensive. But you know, we have clients who their dogs do get attacked like violently attacked by other dogs, and the owner of the attacking dog will blame them. And I have to tell you, there isn't a faster way for people to write you off as a problem and irresponsible and idiotic, right? And you don't wanna be put in that box. Um, at the end of the day, the best thing you can do to protect yourself against people, if they are shitty people, if they do have shitty little dogs, the best thing you can do to protect yourself is to take full accountability.

Your dog should never have gotten away from you. Your dog is your responsibility.

Apologize for that mistake. And then be really proactive about change, right? Actually do it. Don't just sign up for a training program. 'cause we have those people too who just sign up for a training program and they just wanna look good. So when they go to court, they can say, yeah, we went to training. Um, really do it. Like embrace it. And the beautiful thing is you might get way more out of it than you ever planned on. You might finally have a relationship with your dog where you go, oh my God, all these years I thought I was enjoying my dog.

I thought we had a good thing together. And like I had no idea how much better it could be. Like, I've gotten to know my dog in a different way. I've deepened our communication. We're able to do more together. Like this might just be a wake up call for you to learn some stuff. And

29:34 — Successful training could deepen the owner’s relationship with his dog and let them walk…

I mean, really maybe for your dog to save you, right? If you're going through a bad time and you don't really have anyone else right now, and I'm not saying that's his case. I have no idea. Um, but I know I've been there and I know lots of other people have been there. Maybe this happened for a reason, right? Not to get all like, um, <laugh> deep and emotional here, but really, like sometimes I think it's a wake up call from the universe that is like, Hey, you're just floating through life. You're just kinda letting things happen to you.

And like you're missing out on the full experience. The the depth isn't there in your relationships, right? And maybe that starts with your dog, but maybe it bleeds into other relationships. Maybe it bleeds into other projects in life that you haven't been successful with.

Maybe this does something for your attitude. Maybe it does something for your outlook, right? So maybe it's not just dog training, but at any rate, I'm really rooting for, um, this person and I can't imagine finding myself in this situation. Honestly, it does suck, but the good news is I think it's well within his control to improve the situation. It's just a hole he's gonna have to dig outta. Uh, and I'm really hoping that we get to help him do that. We hope you enjoyed today's episode. If there's a topic you'd like to hear discussed, you can send that to me directly at Kati at Diamond Canine dot com via email.

So I will link to that email address in the show notes. Thanks for joining us today, guys. Thanks for supporting the podcast, and I look forward to the next one.