The “Rescue Dog” Fallacy

00:00 — Kati Peppe introduces the podcast and her dog-training practice in Biddeford, Maine.

Speaker 1: Welcome to Off Leash and Unfiltered Trigger Warning. I'm Kati Peppe, delivering the Truth in Dog Training.

Speaker 2: Hey everybody, welcome back to another episode of Off Leashing Unfiltered. I am Kati Peppe, owner of Diamond Canine Dog Training in Biddeford, Maine. Uh, we do eco training, behavior modification, uh, puppy training and raising, um, lots of sorts of different stuff, but our specialty really is the eco part of the business, you know, off leash, reliability and, and modifying behaviors, um, and state of mind work. So, that's who we are, it's what we do. And, uh, this is a podcast where I just kind of talk about whatever the latest inspiration of mine is. Um, usually it's a topic, you know, that I pulled from a recent conversation.

Speaker 2: This is stuff that comes up a lot, lot in talks with my clients and, and friends and family, and just things that I know a lot of people out there are dealing with and wondering about. Um, and things that I think can actually help people.

Speaker 2: So, hit the subscribe button if you haven't already. Help me reach more people so we can help more folks out. Um, it's hard to find the truth, and so that's what I'm here to do, is to deliver that, um, to as many people as I can, and not everyone's ready for the truth. And that's, you know, definitely the case, uh, with the topic that we're gonna cover today, <laugh>. So I'm going to be rattling some chains for sure, uh, with this one. So, uh, rescuing dogs is all the rage, right? I'm sure you've heard that term thrown around a lot.

Speaker 2: And so we're gonna talk about that. And also how to build trust with those dogs, uh, which is huge. And again, this is something that was inspired for me to talk about because it's something I encounter so frequently. And I, I recently had a conversation with a good customer, uh, who obtained a new dog from a rescue organization.

Speaker 2: And, you know, as far as like the training and the timing of the training, there was a lot of hesitation. And so it definitely inspired me to, uh, cover this topic. So I hear, I hear these things a lot. Uh, if you get a dog from a rescue organization, that does not literally mean that your dog was rescued, okay? Anybody can just slap the word rescue on their business or their nonprofit. Okay? I am, I'm doing air quotes there, you can't see me, but there's air quotes, <laugh>. Uh, anybody can just call themselves a rescue.

Speaker 2: That doesn't mean that all the animals there were literally rescued, okay? Just because a person doesn't want their animal anymore or can't keep their animal anymore, that doesn't mean that it's a dire life or death situation, right? So I could literally decide right now that my dog just isn't a great fit for us, or I just don't wanna deal with him anymore. I don't wanna deal with shenanigans, not that he has any Yeah, right? My dog's perfect. Sure he is.

Speaker 2: And I could just call up the rescue and say, you know what? I can't keep this dog. Does that make him a rescue? No, it doesn't. So why do I split hairs about this? Like, why? What's the difference? Well, it does matter. There is a different, and the reason that it matters, there's a lot of reasons, but one of the biggest reasons that it matters is because it gets in people's way. So your dog is adopted from a rescue, and the rescue gives you almost always some far wrenching tear jerking story of the dog's past.

04:00 — Rescue organizations often give adopters emotional backstories that can interfere with effective training.

Speaker 2: And let me tell you something, this is not helpful.

Speaker 2: This doesn't fricking help anybody, okay? Even if it's true, it's not helpful. It gets in people's way. Why? Because now you have somebody adopting a new dog, bringing a new dog into their household, and their relationship is starting off with pity, pity, pity is a terrible thing. So right off the bat, most people in that situation, not all, but most of them, are not going to provide their dog with what they need. Okay? So I want you to listen to that again. They pity the dog they adopted, and so they do not provide what the dog needs, right?

Speaker 2: So who's paying the price here? We do not provide the dog with the proper training. We do not provide the dog with rules. We do not enforce boundaries. We do not clarify for the dog when there are things that we not want them to do. If we have a dog that's anxious, nervous, fearful, we nurture that, we encourage it, we touch it, we pet it, we hug it to death. Sometimes, literally,

Speaker 2: We allow that to continue. We enable it. We perpetuate the bad state of mind. We perpetuate the bad behavior. So we limit the freedom, we limit the confidence, okay? We do not fulfill the dog's needs when we pity the dog. That is true. And this is a really, really, really common occurrence today. We see it so frequently. Uh, and I had, you know, I don't have a ton of clients that are on the pity train sometimes, you know, there's definitely some of that going on when I first meet people, of course, because they're human and, you know, we're all human and we all feel bad sometimes, especially if it is a true story.

Speaker 2: Um, nothing necessarily wrong with that, right? But you can't let it get in your way. And people do. And occasionally I do have a client like that. The one comes to mind in particular, these, and these are fantastic. These are people I could be good friends with. I really liked them. Um, they're great people. And their dog was amazing too. I loved their dog. So they had a dog, um, from some Caribbean island, I don't remember specifically. And the dog was just extremely nervous and anxious of pretty much everything, um, especially strangers and especially men.

Speaker 2: So right off the bat, you can imagine some of the stories that were probably spun about that dog and their past and their history, because if they're afraid of men, there is no other explanation except that they were, you know, chained to a pole and beat within an inch of its life by a man, right? Which is not true. It's usually not the case. Being afraid of humans that are generally taller, bigger, stronger, have stronger energy, have a more assertive energy, that's just normal. It's not that uncommon. It's a very, very common thing in dogs.

08:00 — Fear of men is often attributed to invented abuse stories, despite no evidence supporting…

Speaker 2: Uh, it doesn't mean anything happened. If your dog's afraid of someone in hats, it doesn't mean anything happened to someone in a hat. Your dog's afraid of Santa Claus. It doesn't mean Santa Claus, the dog downstairs, <laugh>. Okay?

Speaker 2: So we have to stop creating stories in our heads, and we have to stop swallowing all the bull crap that were sold by the rescue organizations because it gets in our way. So back to my story. These folks had a dog from the islands, and, uh, they went through a five session program, and the dog was smart and picked up on things quickly. Um, but they didn't get anywhere. They didn't get anywhere, okay? This dog had no coping skills, could not stand being away from its owner, couldn't stand even being separate from its owner in the same room.

Speaker 2: Uh, was really nervous of strangers, was nervous of the man that lived in the house, who by the way, was a very kind man and very soft, very, very soft demeanor, gentle guy. Um, loved this little dog. Uh, so it is, you know, it's not like he did anything to cause the dog to be afraid of him.

Speaker 2: It's just how the dog is. It's who they are. It's how the dog came to them. But that didn't get fixed. It didn't get cleaned up. The dog didn't develop any coping skills. The dog didn't reduce its anxiety. The dog didn't really <laugh> benefit at all, I don't think from the training, um, because they just couldn't do it like this lady. And, and she admits that she's had this problem before with her previous dogs and even with her children, you, she enables the behavior to continue. And I think this is, um, I think this is a thing that happens more often than you realize.

Speaker 2: So hopefully somebody out there that needs to hear this, hears this, I get where you're coming from, but you gotta draw a line in the sand somewhere and do the work on yourself so that you can break out of that cycle, because it is extraordinarily selfish in the end. And there is no other way to see that There really isn't.

Speaker 2: So the actions that you take now, whether we're talking about your kids or your dog, are going to have an impact or the lack of your action depending on what's happening. And if it's a negative impact and you know that it's a negative impact, then it is up to you to make that change. And I know that's a wicked hard pill to swallow for some people, but it's gotta happen. So this of and really couldn't do any of the stuff that we had covered didn't improve at all. So, I mean, it encompassed all the problems from like not putting the equipment on to just not executing the protocols the way they were instructed to at home, all sorts of things.

12:00 — The trainer describes protocols for equipment, warming the dog to a male household member,…

Speaker 2: So I have protocols for warming the dog up to the male partner in the house. I have protocols to teach the dog to be less nervous and be more confident to hold commands even when they're uneasy or unsettled. I have protocols, um, to deal with the separation, but this person admitted to me that they couldn't even make it through a movie without tending to the dog. Like even though the dog is in the same room,

Speaker 2: You know, if they put the dog in a kennel or something, it just cries and she has to go tend to the dog and see if it needs a toy or food or water or bed or whatever the case may be. She's gonna go tend to the dog. She's gonna go help the dog. I can't even imagine the havoc that that would wreak on your relationship <laugh>, um, being that absorbed in what's wrong with the dog. But so all this nurturing and, and coddling to try to help the dog feel better is not only harming your relationship and your person, but it's not actually accomplishing the thing you say you're accomplishing with your dog.

Speaker 2: It's not helping your dog. It's not making them feel better. It is making them worse. So I don't generally refer to dogs as rescues, and that's why, and those people always come to my mind, and that little dog always comes to my mind. I don't pity any dog if I want to help them, because pity will never enable us to help anybody. So don't do that. Oh, geez. Let's see. So what do you do? What if you do have a dog that comes from a rescue, um, and has a story, and maybe the story's even real.

Speaker 2: Maybe they were abused. Maybe they were chained to a tree and left to die. Maybe that stuff's true. Maybe they did bounce around to 50 different houses before they found you. How do you handle that?

Speaker 2: Well, you come out of the gate strong and you start your training. Training is how you build a relationship with your dog, because that's what everyone wants to know, right? Is how do I build a relationship with my dog? How do I build trust with my dog? Which brings me to my other story, which just happened recently. I have a customer that just adopted a new dog. Uh, dog has been bounced around from various different houses and they think she was abused. Now, let me tell you something. Everybody thinks their dog was abused. Everybody. Why?

Speaker 2: Because that's what the rescues push. They push that story so they can tug on your heartstrings and get your donations and perpetuate the cycle of adopt from the shelters. I'm not anti shelter. I'm not anti adopt, but I am anti lies. Uh, and I am obviously opposed to calling dogs rescues. And this is the reason, uh, I think you wanna adopt a dog from a shelter or from an organization that calls themselves a rescue organization. I think that's fine. I think you should adopt any dog you wanna adopt. Um, but they're not doing good work.

Speaker 2: These people that are pushing these lies and these narratives are not doing good work.

16:00 — Assumptions about abuse and abandonment can delay training for dogs with severe separation anxiety.

Speaker 2: It's not right. So my customer recently adopted a dog. They, they think she was abused, like, like most people do. Um, and so they haven't done the training. The dog has severe separation anxiety. And so everybody tells themselves, my dog is a fear of abandonment. Well, your dog doesn't understand abandonment, so that isn't actually possible, right? Your dog knows you're either here or you're not. And that's it. That's what they know. So what you're seeing is just an extreme inability to cope with your leaving or your not present. The way we fix that is through training.

Speaker 2: It isn't through any kind of reassurance. It isn't through building up the duration that they can be by themselves. It's not any of this stuff. It's not. So from her perspective, she thought she should show the dog that they weren't going to hurt her, okay? The dog never thought they were going to hurt them. All you're doing when you postpone your training is you're delaying the healing process, right? So regardless of what the dog's past is, they're obviously not in a good place. Like we can all agree on that. And you're just delaying the improvements, delaying the growth, delaying the healing when delay training.

Speaker 2: So you hear it, you hear the undertones when you talk to people and you hear these stories that the training, you know, is somehow viewed as harsh, right? Training is harsh or it's dangerous

Speaker 2: <affirmative>. Um, you know, 'cause obviously the implication here, you know, they're implying that the training would somehow violate their dog's trust or damage their trust. And that's foolish. Proper training does not do that.

Speaker 2: Yeah, if you're gonna just walk up to your dog and randomly whack it for no reason, right? Kick it with a size nine boot, that's not training. We don't do that, right? Teaching your dog how to do things and then expecting them to do it, that's huge. There is so much value in that. But for some reason, people adopt their quote unquote rescue dogs. They're fed a line of bull crap about the dog being abused, and they go home and they focus on making everything worse. <laugh> like, I hate to say it that way, but that's the truth.

Speaker 2: Training builds an amazing relationship with your dogs. Suddenly you start eliminating anxiety because you are reducing question marks. You're clarifying the unknown for them. Finally, they know how to do things and they know what to do, and they know what is expected and they know how to do it. Um, and they gain confidence through that, right? And you start becoming the center of their universe through all this. And you become the magic one with all the answers and the magic one who provides for them their food, their fun, their play, their training, their direction, their rules, right?

Speaker 2: But you bring a dog home and you just throw 'em into the household and turn 'em loose, and there's no rules and there's no clarity, and it's just chaos. And the, they just wind up more. The anxiety just gets worse most of the time, right? But it makes us feel good. And that's selfish, right? So we can put the dog in our bed at night and we can snuggle them and we can stroke them, and we can make sure they know we won't hurt them. But what we're really doing, if we are to be honest with ourselves, what we're really doing is we're enabling them to stay anxious and scared and nervous, or whatever the case may be with that specific dog.

Speaker 2: We're giving ourselves an excuse to allow them to stay that way and make ourselves feel all warm and fuzzy, not cool.

Speaker 2: So I can't tell you how many times I've heard that when people go through these eco programs with their dogs, how much better their relationship is after. So not only is it like less toxic if the person was getting angry and frustrated at their dog before, but the dogs, they suck up to you. They, they just love you more. They want more affection, they wanna be closer to you. It deepens your communication. You become more relevant. You're just a bigger part of their life, a bigger part of their day. Just every aspect of the relationship just gets better.

Speaker 2: I hear it all the time. And so it makes me incredibly sad when I hear that, you know, and so many people are adopting dogs with a sob story, feeling bad for them, and then not doing the training on top of all of that. Um, because they think the right thing to do is either to not do the training, right? Not put the dog in a kennel, not put an e-collar on the dog, or to wait until the dog knows they're not gonna abandon them. It's not helping. The, I assure you, the best thing you can do, no matter what format of training you're doing, whether it's board and training, private sessions, doesn't matter.

Speaker 2: The best thing you can do is start now, right? So if I brought home tomorrow an extremely fearful dog that nobody could get near, I'm not gonna wait a month to do training. We're gonna start that. We're gonna start that day. And guess what? A month from now, six weeks from now, that dog is gonna be in a much better place. I'm not saying they'd be cured. Every dog is individual, every case is individual, you know, but compared to the next guy who says, oh no, I can't do that right now. That would be wrong.

22:00 — Training should begin immediately after adoption rather than waiting for a fearful dog to…

Speaker 2: That would be bad. My dog's gonna be way better off. So see, I don't have any problem with people thinking, I'm mean, I don't care makes no, nevermind to me, whatever,

Speaker 2: Because I know the truth. And granted, I do take it all for granted because I know, because I see it hands on because I'm immersed in it every day, and I see it with my own eyes. And so it's easy for me to say, and I get that other people don't have that luxury of seeing it day in and day out. They have to kind of take my word for it. But it's like you don't, like, you have the ability to try different things, right? If you're trying something and you're not liking what you're seeing, then stop doing it, right?

Speaker 2: But just listening to the fear mongering and the scare tactics out there, and just letting that keep you frozen, paralyzed, or even getting worse,

Speaker 2: Dude, there's no excuse for that. So the best thing you can do is just jump right in the saddle and start that training. Dive right into the deep end with your dog and build their confidence. Do the hard stuff right? Especially if you have a young dog and they've got their whole life ahead of them. Like get her done. And your dog will lead a better life, and so will you. Everyone will be happier. That's it for today's episode, guys. Thank you all for listening, and I look forward to next time happy practicing with your dogs.

Speaker 2: Feel free to send me your questions, uh, anytime. That's Kati, Kati at Diamond Canine dot com. And that's kine, C-A-N-I-N-E. Uh, send me some questions, let me know what you want me to cover, and we'll talk about it. All right, till next time.